2001-05-03

              Commentary 14

^RECORD

3 May 2001

Letters

Student moms

Dear Editors,

Over the past four years I have felt very welcomed and loved by the members of these two campuses. It was not until I became pregnant that my rose colored glasses shattered and the truth hit me in the face.

*¦' I want desperately to live on campus my senior year and was told that it is illegal to live on campus with a child. My only other option was to move off campus. I did not receive any assistance in finding alternative housing, well, other than my two room mates. I was under the impression that residential life pertained to all who went to school here. X was made to feel that I was no longer a valued member of this community.

Thankfully there was someone who pointed me in the direction of Ms. Sigrid Hedman-Dennis. She proved to be a valued asset, source of information, and a friend who made me feel that I was still a part of the community I had come to love so dearly. Ms. Hedman-Dennis, thank-you for that support in a time that I was having a difficult time with almost everything. There were others who also made me feel welcomed and loved, the Sisters of Saint Benedict, my professors, and my friends.

I was appalled at some of the attitudes towards me when I was pregnant on this campus. I was told that there was no demand or need for people of tny kind. Is this something that is said in a Christian environment? No. It is said, treat others as you yourself would like to be treated. As for my kind, you are strong and it is a strong person who can go to college full time as well as parent full time.

When I returned to campus this fall I was delighted to find out that there were others who were parents on this two campuses as well as students. This group went on to for a recognized club, Parents On Campus. They are a great group and a wonderful resource to talk to when one wants to know about parents. If one wants to learn what parents go through, it is best to talk to parents themselves.

I will be graduating in May with my full degree and my daughter by my side. One can go to school and have a child. I would like to challenge people not to condemn others for their choices, but instead to understand the mag-

nitude of making the decision to stay in school and parent as well.

I am not saying that without a doubt there should be housing on either campus for mothers and fathers, but assistance to those individuals should be given in finding suitable housing. They are in need just as much as other students in need of housing. Do not just dismiss them. As for childcare on campus, I know that there are faculty and staff that would love to have their children close by as well.

,   -Shannon Alti*ich CSB Senior

Another perspecitve

Dear Editors,

The housing of student mothers on campus ended the spring of 1999 when my son, my roommate, her son and I moved out of Rainbow House. After we graduated, the College of Saint Benedict chose to discontinue student mother housing-a decision we are very disappointed with, but we are both very thankful for the support we did receive while at CSB.

While I would love to see student mothers housed on campus, I would like the student body (particularly women who find themselves pregnant) ' not to forget that it is the people at CSB who make the community. Had it not been for people like LuAnn Reif and Sigrid Hedman-Dennis, both my roommate and I would've been lost-no matter which college we attended. Every single person I encountered during my pregnancy and my return to campus with my son-especially my professors and the sisters-embodied the very Benedictine values CSB/SJU prides themselves on. Had it not been for these wonderful individuals and their positive attitudes-attitudes I know from experience do not exist on many other campuses-my college experience would not have been the positive and life-changing event that it was. I am ETERNALLY grateful for the support and love I received from people at CSB/SJU. The "Community" has not ignored "the divine law of the Catholic Church of loving everyone regardless of life decisions." In fact, they embraced the divine-so much so that my son and I flourished at CSB-and we did live off campus (Rainbow house is actually a block off campus and we paid for housing, just as we would be paying for rent in St. Joe).

Before the editors of this publication come down on CSB, please remember that an institution is not just administrative decisions. I now work for CSB and just found out enrollment next year is at an all time high-CSB has housing issues regardless if we are talking about mothers or not. Even though it is^easy to say we should provide housing to everyone (and don't get me wrong, I do think student mother housing is important), there simply needs to be money to back decisions. What good are policies if they cannot be carried through?

Also, I noted that you attack CSB

and leave SJU out of the picture com-pletely-let's please remember that our student Bennies are not getting pregnant by themselves. If you are going to make this an institutional attack, please do so across the board. If CSB needs to take a look at their policies, then SJU should also address, the issue of unprepared fathers. Our mission is joint and so should our approaches to handling this issue-Johnnies need just as much education on the .issues, of,, parenthood and responsibilities as Bennies do.

I am very pleased to hear that a parent group, is.starting, on campus and that,the, issues of daycare are being raised (again-please realize daycare has been an on-going dialogue) and that the Health Advocates are taking on the issue of pregnancy next year. Bennies will continue to become pregnant while students and Johnnies will continue to be half-responsible for some (maybe most) of those unplanned pregnancies. It is everyone's responsibility to become aware of single and student parenting and pregnancy issues.

I was a student mother and so my college experience wouldn't have been like any one else's no matter what I did-but I had the support of the community and Andy and I are eternally grateful to CSB and SJU for that. I would've sacrificed ideal housing for ideal education and a nurturing environment any day. My advice to anyone who finds themselves pregnant on these campuses is to reach out and you will be nurtured; life, especially as a single mom, is all about knowing where your resources are-both in your community and within yourself.

-Tara Tollefson CSB '99

The Layout Guy speaks again

Ryan Engelman The Layout Guy

Now some of you might be saying to yourself, "Why did the layout guy write two columns saying he didn't want to write, then write a column saying he was going to write, then not write any more?" I say to those people, that's a really long question to start a column with, and I don't know. Ask Schaus.

See, I actually did write a real column. And I wrote it within the length requirements, and I sent it in way super early, and it didn't get printed. Apparently "real columns" about "real issues" from "real people" were more important, even though my column was about a real issue.

So anyways, yeah...I forget where I was going with that. It's late, I'm tired,'my eye is all screwed up and I'm feeling about as intellectual as Ulysses' Cyclops. I'm also hoping the James Joyce reference will be enough to make up for the fact that I kinda didn't read so much of the chapter that I was kinda supposed to read for tomorrow...today, actually, considering the time.

Some of you other people might be saying to yourself, "Hey, Mr. Layout Guy, I was just flipping through the paper, and a few pages 1 back there's . a spread that's all about St. John's and is boring and uninformative and really crappily layed-out." My first response to you on that question is, Schaus is yelling in my ear about an owl, so I didn't hear you. My second response to you is, "Quiet you." Lay it out your damn self.

So there.

On to real issues...why doesn't Sexton have fruit punch All-Sport? It has the crappy pastel flavors, but no fruit punch. Fruit punch IS All-Sport, and fruit punch IS All-Sport. I'm being oppressed here.

Please don't ask me to explain the last paragraph, or the next one. And don't at all ask about the features page photo story. At all. Ever. Do not question.

Like a 90-foot fire-breathing lizard stomping on everything you know and love, the layout guy will meet all your layout needs.

Go layout guy. Please.

Can I offer to name my column after a regent if they give me a lot of money?

Here's the part where I ramble some more to fill space, because this rambling pseudo-column was given a ridiculously large and inappropriate amount of space to fill. Umm...how you doing? Classes going okay? Good spring break? Can I stop now? Sweet.

Later kids.